At age 5, Aparna really loved the show about Clifford, the big red dog. In one endearing episode, a key character feels that dogs have a great life and imagines life as a dog. Of course, he soon finds out the disadvantages of being a four-legged creature in a man's world and soon appreciates his real self.
On our morning ride to school, she asked me if I had ever wanted to be someone else, probably hoping for an amusing answer about another creature from the animal species. I had not entertained such fantasies. But I honestly replied that I had quite often wished that I had been a boy. Why? Because I had two brothers and I thought that life was more fun for boys, I replied. She seriously considered my response and then gravely observed, "If you had been a boy, you could never have been my Mommy."
What an astonishing insight! She had no idea about the difficulties I had encountered on my way to attaining motherhood. But she had somehow intuitively tapped into what I considered was my greatest achievement, one which I could not have attained had I been granted my wish of being male. So often we think life would be better if something could change, if we had the advantages available to another, if there were privileges in our possession, tangible benefits that would improve the quality of our lives. But nothing gives more joy than being true to our own selves. Once we accept who we are, with the attendant benefits and baggage, we are able to live life more fully, joyously. And sometimes it takes a little one to point out the larger lesson.
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So true. To accept ourselves as we are is attaining everlasting peace and no less.
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