Learning something new

I am learning to sing. Again. Obtaining formal training from a teacher. This is not the first time I have attempted to learn music.

About 15 years ago, I took my first step towards learning music. I had completed my Ph.D. and found myself jobless, directionless and depressed. The future looked murky at best and each day was difficult. A ray of hope shone at a kid's birthday party where someone directed me towards a middle-aged lady offering Carnatic music classes in the neighborhood. That is how I met Nirmala Mami, a wonderful lady who not only started me off with sa re ga ma but also saw me through some tough times in my personal life. There were days when the only motivation for me to get out of bed was to go to music class. And I had to practice what I had learnt previously at least a little bit before showing up for the next class. I was a quick learner and an interested student. I did not consider myself particularly talented. Two years of classes twice a week was the duration of my music sadhana.

I then moved away. Life changed drastically with the arrival of Aparna and a full time job. Music crept away from my life until another tough patch arrived. Once again I was drawn to singing. This tryst lasted less than a year. Another teacher in the neighborhood, not too demanding. I made very little progress, both on learning and in my confidence in my abilities.

Now I have a fairly smooth life. In my quest to develop my creative side, I again sought a teacher. After a long search, I have found a teacher who comes home once a week. This time I am learning Hindustani music, not just basics but I want to learn some theory and music appreciation. I am learning from a place of peace not pain as in earlier attempts. I am learning it not as a new subject to be understood intellectually. I am trying to understand what type of music I like and what is it that my voice is suited for. It is a different journey this time. After a few sessions, my teacher praised me saying that I have the talent to keep up with her teaching. I felt thrilled.

The journey has just started. What a wonderful place to be!